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Thread: AAAh A joke(Lets share Jokes)

  1. #1

    AAAh A joke(Lets share Jokes)

    Lets share some custom jokes here.......Let me initiate..

    When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to
    be Boss. The brain said, "I should be boss because I
    control the whole body's responses and functions."

    The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the
    brain about and get him to where he wants to go."

    The hands said, "We should be the boss because we do
    all the work and earn all the money."

    And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs,
    and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All
    the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the
    Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up
    and refused to work.

    Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered. Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the boss just sat and passed out the ****!

    Moral of the story:
    You don't need brains to be a boss - any asshole will do.
    Last edited by kandukondein; January 28th, 2004 at 03:53 PM.
    C++ is divine.

  2. #2
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    a Joke...

    Carolina will win??? I kid...rooting for the panthers...why I remember driving down to gastonia to visit my GF and the stadium was just getting put up...good times...love the nuclear plant by the lake

    /Duke (power???) sucks
    //I kid again, DUKE REALLY DOES SUCK...go TERPS!!!

  3. #3
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    ahh kandukondein you got me...weren't you from NC earlier

    /Maybe I need to up my meds....

  4. #4
    Yes but i recently got transferred to Rams team.
    So how is ur x-GF . i think u said she was in Chapelhill right.
    C++ is divine.

  5. #5
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    Originally posted by kandukondein
    Yes but i recently got transferred to Rams team.
    So how is ur x-GF . i think u said she was in Chapelhill right.
    nah...she (was) an appalachian state goober...but a tar heel at heart....


    /Duke still sucks
    //Boone North Carolina still rocks...well except you can only buy beer there...that's a bummer....

  6. #6
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    Ok, heres a good one: (I've been told by a friend this was the best joke I've ever told... HEY! I thought I was a funny bloke!! )

    Anyways heres the joke:


    A guy is having an affair with his secretary. One afternoon they give in to their lust and head down to her place. They make love all afternoon until they fall asleep in each others arms.

    The man wakes up at 8pm and says: "Dammit I gotta get home right now!! My wife will be waiting!" and starts getting dressed in a hurry. While he's doing this, he asks the woman to take his shoes out to the back yard and rub them on the grass. Confused, she does as she is told.

    The man gets home, and sure enough the wife is waiting up for him. She says: "Where the **** have you been?" to which he replies: "I won't lie to you honey, I've been having an affair with my secretary. We went to her place and made love all afternoon. I woke up around 8 and got here as fast as I could".

    His wife is baffled, but she takes one look at his shoes and yells out: ""Don't you lie to me, you've been out playing golf again!!"
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  7. #7
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    moral of the story? asshole isn't *******

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    Oh, you wanna story with a moral?? Heres one:

    (Note to moderators: If any of these jokes are too vulgar for the forum, please delete them and let us know.)



    A man is about to get married in a couple of months. He is at his future in-laws house, with his fiance. His fiance introduces him to her little sister who is only 18 and absolutely stunning.

    The mans fiance realises she forgot to get something at the shops so leaves to go back. So he makes himself comfortable on the lounge and starts watching tv.

    While he's doing this, the little sister walks past really slowly, wearing nothing but a big shirt, undies and a big grin on her face. She winks at him and says: "Come to my room so we can get to know each other a bit better... I wont tell if you wont.. " and with that slowly walks up the stairs, slips her undies off and throws them at the man now sitting shocked on the lounge.

    The man gets up, walks out the door, only to find his fiance, her mother and father standing there. The father, with tears in his eyes, says: "My son, you passed the test! you are worthy of marrying my daughter!" and gives him a big hug.


    Moral of the story: "Never leave your condoms in the car"
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  9. #9
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    I'm still fascinated that asshole isn't *******...I think I've found my new signature ohh you just know somebody is gonna break this up soon

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    Did you hear the one about the two Iowans who froze to death when they went to see a drive in move called "Closed For The Season"?
    Verere testudinem! (Fear the turtle)

    Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy. -Albert Einstein

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  11. #11
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    Originally posted by Tom Frohman
    Did you hear the one about the two Iowans who froze to death when they went to see a drive in move called "Closed For The Season"?

    and then we are going to take south carolina...raarrrrrarrrarrrhhhh....


    /It's good to be turd, then second...maybe I could be first one time??? just once, you'd better or

    rarrarrrrrrrrrrrrrrarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaahhhhhhhhh

  12. #12
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    Originally posted by Tom Frohman
    Did you hear the one about the two Iowans who froze to death when they went to see a drive in move called "Closed For The Season"?
    harr-di-harr harr
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  13. #13
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    Originally posted by Deniz
    (Note to moderators: If any of these jokes are too vulgar for the forum, please delete them and let us know.)
    The idea is that you should be able to tell this yourself, and not post it... though the ones you've posted so far don't seem too bad (I don't get the fiance one...).
    SolarFlare

    Those who cling to life die and those who defy death live. -Sun Tzu

    cout << endl;
    return 0;
    }

  14. #14
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    Originally posted by SolarFlare
    I don't get the fiance one....

    He left his condoms in the car, so he was walking out to get them but ran into the family.. turns out his future father-in-law was testing him.. So, because he walked out, it looked like he was rejecting the sister.
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  15. #15
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    Moral of the story: don't be as stupid as SolarFlare.
    SolarFlare

    Those who cling to life die and those who defy death live. -Sun Tzu

    cout << endl;
    return 0;
    }

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