Spider Man.............No More!

[miteshpandey]

OK, but really, why do we have to involve the parents at all? That's my question... Why can't the two people that get married arrange everything?

Cultural and social differences. Asian kids are more bound to the family and parents as a whole. I am 28 and still living with my parents in a joint family. In Europe and America you could find this very strange and even shameful. Not only marriages, but every major decisions I take involves the whole family. This could be both bad and good. I have seen cases even in my own family that if parents do not take the initiative and arrange for the marriage, the boy or girl is left unmarried for the entire life.

You'would be surprised to know in marriages here not only parents are involved but from grand parents to uncles and aunts, close family friends come into action. To go along with the marriage, the proposal should pass with "No objection" along the entire family hierarchy.

But the scenario is changing slowly mainly in the urban areas where people are more literate and independent.

[cilu]

Well, in Asia, families ties are considered very important. [...]

Cultural and social differences. Asian kids are more bound to the family and parents as a whole. I am 28 and still living with my parents in a joint family. In Europe and America you could find this very strange and even shameful. Not only marriages, but every major decisions I take involves the whole family. This could be both bad and good. I have seen cases even in my own family that if parents do not take the initiative and arrange for the marriage, the boy or girl is left unmarried for the entire life.

I definitelly agree that it's good to know the family and relatives of the person you want to marry. It's good to know the "background" of the person you marry. But, you should not forget that children are not accountable for their parents deeds, nor for their other relatives, and if something bad happened in the family it shouldn't stop you to marry someone, especially when she/he doesn't have anything to do with that. Don't know if you've seen the movie "Bend it like Beckham"; when I did, I was quite shoked on how much the familly "background", or other members of the family's deeds can influence a decision of marrying. If you've seen it, does it happen like that in those parts?

Well, one thing that I can tell you for sure is that I learned a few things from this thread.

[Alpha Vijayan]

Congrats Ejaz
May you both united together in the holy matrimony. God bless you both

[sreehari]

I definitelly agree that it's good to know the family and relatives of the person you want to marry. It's good to know the "background" of the person you marry. But, you should not forget that children are not accountable for their parents deeds, nor for their other relatives, and if something bad happened in the family it shouldn't stop you to marry someone, especially when she/he doesn't have anything to do with that. Don't know if you've seen the movie "Bend it like Beckham"; when I did, I was quite shoked on how much the familly "background", or other members of the family's deeds can influence a decision of marrying. If you've seen it, does it happen like that in those parts?

Its not only that the Children are accountable for their parents deeds, sometimes even the parents are accountable for the childrens deeds. i would not call it accountability , ( it differs in different peoples views and how they look at things ) but , in cultures in this part , all this is more or less related , ones action will/ might influence others thinking. it could be because the society the culture plays a very important role.
Frankly, here in india still intercast marriages are not fully accepted, let alone the family , the society is not ready to accept.

The movie , thats a tipical orthodox family of India , things like these used to happen in the past probably about 50 years back, were the women folk were to be inside the house it self, as they were the house makers. such things still happen in remote place , villages in some rural parts of india till date

[Deniz]

Finally, last night Ejaz took the lead of Deniz and Peejavery............and unbelievably (for him) got engaged. Yup, spider man.....no more!!!

Congratulations!

[Ejaz]

Congrats Ejaz
May you both united together in the holy matrimony. God bless you both

Thanx

[Ejaz]

Congratulations!

Thanx , btw any advice(s)?

[sreehari]

Thanx , btw any advice(s)?

is that question open for every one to ans or only for Married members ??

[Ejaz]

is that question open for every one to ans or only for Married members ??

Well, this is a free/open development community, anything that is under AUP is acceptable and as Deniz is both senior and generous in giving advices (specially to engaged or guys getting married), so I just asked him. I remember his one advice to someone

Secret of Safe Marriage Life: "Yes Maam, Ok Maam", thats all

So, I was wondering, is there is something else stored in there. If you wanna contribute, then sure, be my guest

[cherish]

My, my... wasn't it not long ago that you Ejaz asked me when I'll be settling down.. and look at you now.... engaged and getting married in six months or so...

[Ejaz]

My, my... wasn't it not long ago that you Ejaz asked me when I'll be settling down.. and look at you now.... engaged and getting married in six months or so...

Yeah, some one told me that the time that I can have is one that I'm having right row, between engagement and wedding. Lets see, anyway I would still like to say that, blind men are not that bad, and the time that is gone, won't come back again , so ....................... you know what I mean, yeah offcourse you do

[cherish]

Yeah, some one told me that the time that I can have is one that I'm having right row, between engagement and wedding. Lets see, anyway I would still like to say that, blind men are not that bad,

LOL!!

... and the time that is gone, won't come back again , so ....................... you know what I mean, yeah offcourse you do

So... you're saying you really really like her, huh? That's really great.

// Just make sure she doesn't find out what [...] means.

[Ejaz]

LOL!!

So... you're saying you really really like her, huh? That's really great.

Well, not exactly, let me put it in a better way, I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really ......................... really, like her

// Just make sure she doesn't find out what [...] means.

Well, sooner or later, I'll have to tell her about [...] myself. I'm sure, she'll be strong enough to take it, or Doctor Deniz Golden Theorm is there "Yes Maam, Ok Maam"

[cherish]

Well, not exactly, let me put it in a better way, I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really ......................... really, like her

That's really^10
I am really so happy for both of you. And I have a feeling that she as a great sense of humor, so you won't be having any problem telling her out about [...]

[Ejaz]

That's really^10 I am really so happy for both of you.

Thanx