Just another squirrel trying to get a nut.
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Just another squirrel trying to get a nut.
The squirrel community is appalled:Quote:
Originally posted by galathaea
I woke up today thinking maybe, instead of living with the apathy, change was really possible, the world could really grow, and *sniff* love could really bond us all. So I post now a link I hope will turn Tom around. A link so awe-inspiringly beeyootiful that I hope will touch Tom's soul and turn that apathy into happathy! Go here now, infidels!
"I thought cosmetics testing on us animals was outlawed years ago."
"You can't say those lyrics on air!"
etc.
Who cares.
:confused:
Quote:
Originally posted by Tom Frohman
:confused:
You suck, and I don't care :D
And so the apathy starts to fade....Quote:
Originally posted by Tom Frohman
:confused:
Well, if apathy is fading, nobody cares about apathy anymore.
President Bush declares war against Apathy
Declares Tom, Mick, and Tom "Axis of Apathy"
In his weekly television address, President Bush claimed to have invented a country and then destroyed it. Some of its "cowardly citizens have fled the warzone and now inhabit locations all over the world, most notably the US itself and CodeGuru.com," said Bush. These apathetic people, who preach to the god of Agnosticism, surround us everywhere. "Some of you may not care about this war," continued Bush, "but it is necessary to combat these Apathians with great emotion, even if that emotion be stupidity." Bush's top advisors scheduled a meeting for Wednesday to explain to him that stupidity is not an emotion, but a disease for which there is no cure.
A) You named me twice.
B) Who cares.
I (me) don't (we) care (you)
I have nothing to declare, except this eclair...
No no no buddy don't snort the anthrax..._D_A_M_N lost another assistant...
NO CURE? This is yet another example that western medicine has yet to unravel all the mysteries of infectious disease. Yes, stupidity is infectious, a fact witnessed by the Like Father Like Son Syndrome or the even more stubborn The Lord Works In Mysterious Ways Syndrome caused by weekly exposure to religious ceremony. For me it all started with an itch at the back of my brain. I reached up and scratched my neck, thinking “That’s stupid. Why am I scratching my neck when it’s my brain that itches”. Little did I realize that I had just began a journey down a dark and dismal path; a journey that I have yet to complete... Soon after this first symptom appeared I started to notice little things that seemed harmless: I was shaking cans of V8 after I had opened them, I kept putting the milk in the cupboard instead of the refrigerator, I always seemed to notice when I was undressing that I had put my underwear on backwards.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
stupidity is not an emotion, but a disease for which there is no cure.
I just chalked these incidents up to absentmindedness. Things got worse. Soon I was watching network television shows and engaging in small talk with acquaintances: “What did you think about that movie?. Don’t you think Tom Hank’s acting was superb.”, I would be asked, and forgive me, I would answer such questions . It makes me shudder now just thinking about it. The disease progressed. I was unable to comprehend simple computations and had lost an interest in reading. Life was flying by and, this is the most dangerous symptom of the illness, I felt happy. Happiness is 99% of the time an indication of a serious infection of stupidity. I don’t know what part of my brain managed to escape the grasp of the disease for a moment, but one morning I woke up and thought, “What is wrong with me. I need help“.
I went to the doctor and explained my concerns. Luckily this doctor had experience with the condition and after a series of tests was able to conclude that stupidity had invaded every part of my body. He told me that the condition was chronic and there was no treatment. This sent me into a tailspin. I became resigned to my fate and even began to stop noticing the effects of the disease. I took an interest in sporting events and began to be impressed by the wisdom of clichés. I sometimes would catch my left knee drooling. Just when it seemed that I had reached the ultimate bottom I TOOK CONTROL. My first step was to pinpoint the source of my infection. I strongly suspected a woman. I called her and let her know that I had become stupid and I suspected she was the cause. After all, I told her, she was not just stupid , but idiotic and so could be a super spreader of the disease. I don’t know if she has sought help for her illness, but I did my part. My mind was the easy part to cure. I administered large constant doses of caffeine and through will power, reasserted the individual. Forced computation and complete isolation from casual acquaintances broke the strangle hold of stupidity. To free the body of stupidity is a much more complex and grueling endeavor. It requires daily exercise and, in some cases, beating. I am happy to report that at this time my pinky toes and left elbow show no signs of infection. As I type this I am staring down at my naked feet. My, what smart looking toes.
Well that explains why souldog wasn't named as a part of the Axis of Apathy (which by definition must have exacly three members).
I realize I should have posted that narative in the boring thread, but I landed in this thread first and was too apathetic to switch over.
I just have to say, I got thru the first sentence then well, I got bored...I don't care...
Like I care