well who was fighting the bull? And if the bull won...Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
/sheez...some people
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well who was fighting the bull? And if the bull won...Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
/sheez...some people
Ahh... ok, my misperception of of a different culture :) .Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
Sadly I have seen this in action...well not quite. But I recall sitting at a resturant bar in a state that practices this very thing. So the guy orders a plate of 'mountain oysters' as they are called. They are deep fried....he winds up complaining because there was too much 'batter' used and not enough 'meat'. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Just curious, where did this happen?Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
Montana ;) They also put tomato juice in the beer...called a red eye if I recall correctly.Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Never been in those parts :shrug: . But from what I hear, there is little big gov interference there, ahh... music to my ears :) .Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
I thought (for some odd reason) that the bulls would fight with other bulls... I need to get out of Germany asap.
I've been there a few times, among many other places ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Yea they are mostly against goverment interference. Very nice polite people up there, give you the shirt off their back.
Very nice country if you like mountains from the central to the west, it's all plains to the east.
Little big horn is down in the south-east central on the Crow reservation, no big deal I'd skip it.
Glacier park, yellowstone the part in montana, flathead valley/lake is nice.
bozeman, kalispell, missoula,helena are nice places.
Good fishing, good hunting. And lots of wide open space.
it is vague but I seem to think they don't call them mountain oysters...seems like they call them something else...don't recall...been a while since I've been up there.
Hmm... Now when I'm done with my masters I have 2 choices to when it comes down to getting out of the North East. Montana or Texas. Too bad there is no high-speed train connecting the two :( .Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
Why not moving to Austria? :DQuote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Sorry, I'm not a big fan of socialist bloated governments ;) (not to say that our federal government is as skinny as a stick :rolleyes: .)Quote:
Originally Posted by NoHero
It would take you 2 days to get to MT. But the train runs along the northern part, I think it goes through kalispell.Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
I would pick montana, clean, pretty, laid back. But economy wise...not really bumping.
But if you stick with bozeman, missoula, helena, kalispiel, and find a programming job in one of those (which there are) then dude you'd be living like a king....
:thumb: :thumb: :thumb: :thumb: :thumb:Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
I just hope that there is some for Linux, I'd love to work in that environment...Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
I think we had best get back to the jokes before we get yelled at.Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Two nuns and a frog walk into a bar...
How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Give her a pack of M&M's and tell her to sort them alphabetically...
/Here all week, new show starts at 11.
Crap, second joke in a row that I don't get, this is officially a bad day for me, grr...Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
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A man hails down a taxi and tells the driver to take him to the nearest hotel.
On the way there the passenger changes his mind and taps the driver on the shoulder...
The driver screams bloody-murder, swerves on the road and almost crashes into a lamp-post...
The passenger says "Man, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you like that."
The driver responds "Oh, no, it's perfectly alright sir. You see, it's just that this is my first day as a taxi driver after operating a hearse for the past 35 years."
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:D
Hmm..I think it came in the Readers' Digest :cool:
Here is a classy one:
:D :D :D :DQuote:
A sergent, a Colonel, a Aunt and her niece was waiting in a bus stop. A little while later the sergent started to flirt with the neice. After a while the bus came and all the four got onto the bus. The Colonel and sergent sat on the seat behind that of Aunty and niece. Both Col. and Aunty was sitting next to the window. The flirting continued and were going a bit out of limits. Thats when the bus entered a tunnel. Then there was a sound of a smooch and a slap. When the bus came out of it everybody was sitting straight as if nothing happened. This is what each one of them thought:
Aunty: I knew that the sergent liked my niece, he kissed her. She slapped him back.
Niece: Yea...I know that the sergent liked me and he kissed me. Aunty didn't seemed to like it. So she must have slapped him.
Col.: Hmm...the sergent liked the girl. He kissed her. Her aunty's face seemed she didn't liked it. So she slapped him. He must have ducked. So I got it.
Srgt: WOW...it was one of my best days in life. I kissed a girl and slapped the Colonel :D :D
I see ... :cry:Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
I'd have a beer with you any day, just don't expect me to have a talk in politics ;) .Quote:
Originally Posted by NoHero
Shure, lets have one on the 29. August, my birthday :) :)Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
:wave:
I'll need a teleportation machine in order to get my arse to Austria in a jiffy and back ;) .Quote:
Originally Posted by NoHero
I received this one some time ago. I still keep it in my mailbox ...
Quote:
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.
Suddenly, she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. "Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap ........ and stay for breakfast.
The next morning, she cooks a gourmet breakfast with all the trimmings.
The guy is amazed!! Everything had been SO incredible!!!! "You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"
"No," she replies........."
"You just happened to catch my eye."
That's sweet ;)
Yeh, that's pretty good Elrond...
going by train to wels from regensburg will take at least 1 hour, and back 1 hour again. having a good cold beer will also take an hour. do you have 3 hours for me??? :DQuote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Yes, but I'll be in the states by then and I'm not aware of an ultra-high-speed train that goes under the ocean from the North East to Austria ;) .Quote:
Originally Posted by NoHero
:cry: ... I was looking forward to drink a cold good Austrian beer with you, on my birthday ... Life is not fair ...Quote:
Originally Posted by YourSurrogateGod
Well on the bright side he's not unemployed :rolleyes: .
Good campaign slogan...Quote:
EARTH FIRST!!! - we'll log other planets later.
You know that an energy crisis is coming to personal electronic appliances when you see this in the papers...Quote:
Energizer Bunny arrested! Charged with battery.
Sometimes it's best to be a NoHero then a Last Minute Hero ;) .Quote:
Last Minute Hero
A man appears before St. Peter at the pearly gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asks.
"Well, I can think of one thing," the man offers.
"Once, on a trip to the Black Hills, out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker. I smacked him on the head, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring and threw it on the ground, and told him, 'Leave her alone now or you'll answer to me.'"
St. Peter was impressed. "When did this happen?"
"Just a couple of minutes ago."
A drunk guy staggers into a Catholic church and sits down in a confession box and says nothing. The bewildered priest coughs to attract his attention, but still the man says nothing.
The priest then knocks on the wall three times in a final attempt to get the man to speak. Finally, the drunk replies, "No use knocking mate, there's no paper in this one either...
Appaling... :D
Moses comes down from the mount with 3 boards having the 15 commandments written on them. He goes before the people of Israel and sais:
- Behold, I have brought you the fith...
Then he drops one of the stones that crashes on the ground.
- ten commandments.
See Mel Brook's History of the WorldQuote:
Originally Posted by cilu
I've seen it already. Where did you think I took it? :cool:
I saw about 5 minutes of that movie several years ago... ironically it was exactly that part... :o
A drunken pirate stumbles into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of the top of his dungarees. The bartender says, "Hey pal, you got a steering wheel in your pants", and the pirate replies, "Arrgh, I know, it's drivin' me nuts."
ah, thankyou, thankyou..
An american, an english and a rabbi enter a bar. The bartender says: "What is this, a joke?"
Since we're on the topic of appaling jokes:
Quote:
A Northern Territory farm hand radios back to the farm manager.
"Boss, I gotta helluva problem here. I hit a pig with the ute. The pig's OK, but he's stuck in the bullbars at the front of my ute and is
wriggling and squealing so much I can't get him out."
The manager says "Ok, there's a 303 behind the seat. Take it, shoot the pig in the head and you'll be able to remove him."
Five minutes later I the farm hand calls back.
"I did what you said boss. Took the 303, shot the pig in the head
and removed him from the bull-bars. No problem there, but I still can't go on".
"Now what's the problem?" raged the manager.
"Well boss, it's his motor-bike. The flashing blue light is
stuck under the right-front wheel arch".
Dear Freind,
The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a bumper sticker saying, "Honk if u love Jesus." I was feeling a bit sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir service, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy am I glad I did! What an uplifting experience followed!
I was stopped at a red light on a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is.... and I didnt notice that the light had changed. It's a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed!! I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!
While I was sitting there, the guy behind me started honkin like crazy - and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, "For the love of GOD, woman, GO! GO!, Jesus Christ, GO!!!"
What an exuburant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honkin! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love.
There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach". I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant. He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something....
Well I've never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out of the window and gave him the good luck sign right back! My grandson burst out laughing... he was enjoying the religious experience too...!!
A couple of people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended but this is when I noticed the lights had changed - so I waved to all the good brothers and sisters grinning and drove on through the intersection. I noticed I was the only car that got through before the lights changed and I felt kinda sad that I had to leave them - especially after all the love we had shared. So I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away!! Thank the Lord for all these God fearing folk!!
Love,
Grandma.
I like Deniz's :p
A cop told us that joke.... Ahh the humour in irony... :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Yves M
will it ever stop? :rolleyes:
Quote:
So a man gets pulled over for speeding. The cop comes up to his door, and asks for his license and registration... the man suddenly breaks down... and admits that the car is stolen, there is a gun in the glovebox, and a body in the trunk... the officer immediately calls for back up... and makes the man get out of the car, handcuffing him, holding him at gunpoint til backup arrives. The backup cop arrives, and runs check on the car, hmmm... it's in the suspect's name... it's not stolen... he says... then he checks the glovebox ... no gun... then the trunk... no body... the back up cop walks over to the suspect and says... my partner told me you stole this car... and admitted to having a gun in the glovebox and a body in the trunk... the man... with an absolutely shocked expression tells the cop... WHAT??? thats bulls**t! i'll bet you that a**hole told you i was speeding too didnt he?
Code:A young boy had just gotten his drivers permit and asked his father if he could use the car. His father said "I'll make a deal with you". " If you bring your grades up, study your Bible and get your hair cut, you can use it". A month later the boy came back and asked about the car. The dad said "son I'm very proud of you, you brought your grades up, you study the Bible but you still haven't got your hair cut". The boy said "dad, I been thinking, Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, even Jesus had long hair. His father replied, "yes son and they walk everywnere they went
hope u like this piece
Quote:
A young boy had just gotten his drivers permit and asked his father if he could use the car. His father said "I'll make a deal with you". " If you bring your grades up, study your Bible and get your hair cut, you can use it". A month later the boy came back and asked about the car. The dad said "son I'm very proud of you, you brought your grades up, you study the Bible but you still haven't got your hair cut". The boy said "dad, I been thinking, Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, even Jesus had long hair. His father replied, "yes son and they walk everywnere they went
In South Africa a black man walked with a parrot on his shoulder. On his way he meets a white man who said:
"Wow! How beautiful he is... What about talking?"
"I don't know. I just bought him", answered the parrot.
Hearing so many people speaking about his intelligence level, George
"double you" Bush decided to get his brain checked. The physician
diagnosis was as follows: "Mr. President, you have two brains, the left
and the right, like all normal people. But the problem is that in your
left brain there is nothing right and in your right brain there is
nothing left."