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Xeon, better you know this sooner than later: it was my company that sold you the new computer equipment, and it was extremely bugged. Maybe you've read the novel 1984 by George Orwell. Well, the computer is even more bugged than that. I could have it perform a biopsy on you anytime I want and you wouldn't even know it.
Now, Simon, maybe we could make an agreement,, cuz you want that information and i want your wallet... if you catch my drift.
I was afraid that would be the case. I didn't know any more what you had already downloaded from me. But now I remember ( solarflare, don't try to be funny or you'll end up as a supernova :D ): I put it also in the GIF file of my own Xeon-chainsaw-massacring avatar. You downloaded that one so you're pretty much screwed. :D And know, I won't spare you're life. :eek:Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
He|| arggghhh! No no~! Please don't, Simon! What harm have I ever done you? Please don't make my life miserable anymore, Simon O' Satan! U're marvellous and you transcend all things! Please spare my life, Simon! :( :( :(
From Solar:
Nice crap, Solar. Keep it up. :cool:Quote:
Xeon, better you know this sooner than later: it was my company that sold you the new computer equipment, and it was extremely bugged. Maybe you've read the novel 1984 by George Orwell. Well, the computer is even more bugged than that. I could have it perform a biopsy on you anytime I want and you wouldn't even know it.
Nice deal, Solar. Now, maybe u can make a deal with me instead. Finish off Simon and u have access to my wallet. :DQuote:
Now, Simon, maybe we could make an agreement,, cuz you want that information and i want your wallet... if you catch my drift.
From Simon:
U're getting too big-headed, Simon! Really! Currently, I'm working on a program to take over the world. In the coming future, you're gonna have to taste my feet. But fret not, cos' I'll soak my feet in cow dung before you taste it. This is what we call "top-flavouring". :D:DQuote:
And know, I won't spare you're life.
Cheerio, Simon. Ain't you kinda happy now? :):D
There is little money to find in a hobo's wallet. :DQuote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Nice deal, Solar. Now, maybe u can make a deal with me instead. Finish off Simon and u have access to my wallet. :D
I knew they have strange cravings (chicken chops) in Singapore, but I never thought they liked the taste of cow dung. Perhaps because it's only you. :D :pQuote:
Originally posted by Xeon
U're getting too big-headed, Simon! Really! Currently, I'm working on a program to take over the world. In the coming future, you're gonna have to taste my feet. But fret not, cos' I'll soak my feet in cow dung before you taste it. This is what we call "top-flavouring". :D:D
Now I am... Wait, wait... Not yet. Don't forget to vote for me... :pQuote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Cheerio, Simon. Ain't you kinda happy now? :):D
Simon says: solarflare, don't try to be funny or you'll end up as a supernova
Xeon says: Nice crap, Solar.
SolarFlare says (now): Oh no! They're all against me now! My world domination plans... nooo......!!!!
Hmmm... I have the power to destroy either Simon or Xeon and get the other's wallet... and possibly rip the wallet out of the corpse as well... but Xeon is making a program to take over the world, which I could use... but Simon is winning the dumb poll and I could really use an assistant no smarter than I... ok, tell you what. After much thought, I'll let you both live. Until I make up my mind. It could happen in the middle of the night, or when you least expect it. Then you will know who I have chosen to live, and it will not be you...
From Simon:
There is! Money is still money, buster. :pQuote:
There is little money to find in a hobo's wallet.
We have fetishes all the time and this applies to everyone on this planet. Including you, Simon! I know you've a serious and uncurable fetish for fat gurls and weird gurls in devil suits. U're gross and you disgust me, pal. :eek:Quote:
I knew they have strange cravings (chicken chops) in Singapore, but I never thought they liked the taste of cow dung. Perhaps because it's only you
By the way, if I soak my feet in cow dung before getting you to clean it away for me, wouldn't that be darn exciting for you??!!! :D
Never. If I could find a way to make you vanish from these forums altogether.....ummmm...Quote:
Now I am... Wait, wait... Not yet. Don't forget to vote for me...
Nay, Solar! Haven't you heard that George War Bush is naming us 3 as the "Axis of Evil"??!!! Solar, Simon, Xeon.Quote:
Hmmm... I have the power to destroy either Simon or Xeon and get the other's wallet... and possibly rip the wallet out of the corpse as well... but Xeon is making a program to take over the world, which I could use... but Simon is winning the dumb poll and I could really use an assistant no smarter than I... ok, tell you what. After much thought, I'll let you both live. Until I make up my mind. It could happen in the middle of the night, or when you least expect it. Then you will know who I have chosen to live, and it will not be you...
We really should take out War Bush before killing each other. Once War Bush is down, you can conquer America(from Canada to the USA to the very bottom of South America), I can conquer the entire Asia and the Asia Pacific(Papua New Guinea, Australia and New Zealand), and Simon can conquer Russia and the entire European and it's neighbours, including the entire Middle East and Africa.
Then, we 3 can fight each other to our deaths once these countries are taken. And yes. To prevent any interruptions, we might have to take down Osama too, or else he might be a threat to our new civilisations.
This also means that we have galatic access to gurls all over. In other words, you have them all. :cool::cool::cool::cool:
Reminds me of satirewire's most famous article. It's too bad the guy stopped writing. The other articles are worth reading too.Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Nay, Solar! Haven't you heard that George War Bush is naming us 3 as the "Axis of Evil"??!!!
Okay, you definitely don't know my plans well enough. First of all, I will not share my domain with anyone. Secondly, if I conquer a plot of land as big as America every day, how long would it take me to conquer the whole universe??? That's right, 29634087235 macroyears.Quote:
We really should take out War Bush before killing each other. Once War Bush is down, you can conquer America(from Canada to the USA to the very bottom of South America), I can conquer the entire Asia and the Asia Pacific(Papua New Guinea, Australia and New Zealand), and Simon can conquer Russia and the entire European and it's neighbours, including the entire Middle East and Africa.
You mean to your deaths (at my hand)!Quote:
Then, we 3 can fight each other to our deaths once these countries are taken.
When pigs can fly. :D I expect that never to happen. Unless you have an untold genetic program aboard your spaceship. But you're too dumb for that. Not knowing Lorentz tranformations, you'll underestimate the time dilatation effects, come too late out of hyperspace and end up burning in the center of the sun. :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
It could happen in the middle of the night, or when you least expect it.
From Solar:
Crap, pal! Since you don't wanna accept this nice deal and u dare to show me utter disrespect, then I really should show you my nasty side.Quote:
Okay, you definitely don't know my plans well enough. First of all, I will not share my domain with anyone. Secondly, if I conquer a plot of land as big as America every day, how long would it take me to conquer the whole universe??? That's right, 29634087235 macroyears.
Up the rockets and slam the fool!
Beat the accursed and kick his head!
Tie his hands up and set a bomb!
Grind his teeth and bite his feet!
Disclaimer : The above poem DOES NOT mean anything to anyone. We all know whadda' good guy Xeon is and anything he says is purely for fun and means no offence, unlike Simon's hidden intentions.
I told you, I know what the Lorentz stuff is! And as for hyperspace, I don't like to travel there, cuz it makes me a bit queasy. All that space... it's just too hyper... I'm sorry what were you saying? ;):D:D:(Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
When pigs can fly. :D I expect that never to happen. Unless you have an untold genetic program aboard your spaceship. But you're too dumb for that. Not knowing Lorentz tranformations, you'll underestimate the time dilatation effects, come too late out of hyperspace and end up burning in the center of the sun. :rolleyes:
Ummm... traditionally the disclaimer is where you negate any accusatory statements you've made, not exaggerate them.Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Disclaimer : The above poem DOES NOT mean anything to anyone. We all know whadda' good guy Xeon is and anything he says is purely for fun and means no offence, unlike Simon's hidden intentions.
From Solar:
Rubbish! U see, this happens to be the cutest disclaimer in the world. That's the point. Need Xeon say more???!!!! :cool::cool::cool::cool::cool:Quote:
Ummm... traditionally the disclaimer is where you negate any accusatory statements you've made, not exaggerate them.
I was just trying to warn you of the consequences of going to ludicrous speed. Don't say I didn't warn ya. :DQuote:
Originally posted by solarflare
I told you, I know what the Lorentz stuff is! And as for hyperspace, I don't like to travel there, cuz it makes me a bit queasy. All that space... it's just too hyper... I'm sorry what were you saying? ;):D:D:(
Ludicrous speed? That's too slow! What I really need is... PREPOSTEROUS SPEED!!!
I hope your helmet is even bigger and stronger than that off Lord Helmet then. :D ;) Pure titanium would maybe do... Or no, I'm mistaking : you don't need a helmet as these protect ones brains, something you are missing. :DQuote:
Originally posted by solarflare
Ludicrous speed? That's too slow! What I really need is... PREPOSTEROUS SPEED!!!
Simon, the man in your avatar may not be traveling at preposterous - or even ridiculous - speed, but he too needs a helmet.Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
I hope your helmet is even bigger and stronger than that off Lord Helmet then. :D ;) Pure titanium would maybe do... Or no, I'm mistaking : you don't need a helmet as these protect ones brains, something you are missing. :D
A good helmet is fighting the symptoms.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
Simon, the man in your avatar may not be traveling at preposterous - or even ridiculous - speed, but he too needs a helmet.
A better operating system is finding a cure.
Since they say genius isn't recognized in its own time, I guess this pretty much qualifies you.Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
A good helmet is fighting the symptoms.
A better operating system is finding a cure.
I thought you would suggest me to use Portals. It could be worth a try. Micro$oft could be better. Mikro$oft (chairman Beal Gates, part of Xeon's empire) is probably even worse. But then again, if it would be a good OS, maybe you would have conquered this solar system already. :DQuote:
Originally posted by solarflare
Since they say genius isn't recognized in its own time, I guess this pretty much qualifies you.
Think again, valiant Simon. The best among us know that it is not worth having it all unless you know the correct time to strike. I do know, and it is not now. It is soon. Have you read The Count of Monte Cristo? Well, I was/am that guy. A very sly man, indeed. When taken for dead, he gathered an immense and endless fortune and, in order to get his revenge on those who had caused his miserty, attacked their minds over a long period of time.Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
But then again, if it would be a good OS, maybe you would have conquered this solar system already. :D
ha! i'm 17 (programming since 14)
I'm afraid I have to admit I stopped reading literature somewhere at age 15. But I've already heard of it and currently I'm taking three weeks vacation until monday the 6th of January, so maybe I'll reduce my barbarianness by reading a book. Do not misunderstand me : I stopped reading fiction at that age except for the books I had to review at school. I kept reading non-fiction (scientific) books and such, and I'm very well informed about the situation in the world by a good newspaper.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
Think again, valiant Simon. The best among us know that it is not worth having it all unless you know the correct time to strike. I do know, and it is not now. It is soon. Have you read The Count of Monte Cristo? Well, I was/am that guy. A very sly man, indeed. When taken for dead, he gathered an immense and endless fortune and, in order to get his revenge on those who had caused his miserty, attacked their minds over a long period of time.
If you read a book, make sure it's a good one! Reading bad books is no fun, and believe me, I've had my fair share of that. Depending on what kind of book you'd like I could make some good recommendations, I think ;).
Well, OK. First : is 'The Count of Monte Christo' a good book? And what can you recommend?Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
If you read a book, make sure it's a good one! Reading bad books is no fun, and believe me, I've had my fair share of that. Depending on what kind of book you'd like I could make some good recommendations, I think ;).
Well from the same author:Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
Well, OK. First : is 'The Count of Monte Christo' a good book? And what can you recommend?
The 3 Mousketåers
Fourty-Five
20 Years Later
other authors:
Isaak Asimov, Stanislav Lem, Tery Pratchet, Dougls Adams, Jules Verne, but especialy Roger Zelazni (The Amber Chronicles rule)
PS 'The Count of Monte Christo' is a wonderful book
For you, Simon666, I'd say go get A Canticle For Liebowitz. Its probably something you'd need to read eventually...
Or maybe Stranger in a Strange Land.
Something like those...
Quote:
The 3 Mousketåers
Fourty-Five
20 Years Later
Personally, speaking as a Dumas fanatic, I wouldn't recommend Forty Five. Especially, if you read it out of sequence without first having read Marguerite de Valois (an excellent book) first, like i did :).
The Count of Monte Cristo is definitely Dumas' best novel.
My favorite authors Dumas, Hermann Hesse and Evelyn Waugh.
Thanks for all the replies. This makes me feel really dumb. :( But then again, currently I am the dumbest and I even voted for myself. I'll see how much time I have. I would also like to read about C++ and some other programming books my brother (programmer) brought from the recent book fair.
I see you already have many fine suggestions. The answer can be put bluntly: there are good books of all genres out there; it depends what you like.Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
Well, OK. First : is 'The Count of Monte Christo' a good book? And what can you recommend?
You seem like the type to enjoy The hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy (Douglas Adams, as mentioned above), but it's a bit below an adult's reading level. I wouldn't use that as an excuse to pass it up, though. Yes, the Count of Monte Cristo is an excellent book. If you like science fiction, I recommend Arthur C Clarke. His most famous book (maybe you've heard of it) is 2001: a space odyssey. For fantasy, there are the Harry Potter books. I've never read them, but I know people of all ages who have read them and all (no exceptions) have been enthralled by it. If you want non-fiction that reads as interestingly as fiction, perhaps you should get your hands on Cosmos (Carl Sagan). Carl Sagan is a genius of a scientist, and this book hits on many many interesting topics. If you have other categories in mind you would like, don't hesitate to ask ;-)~
And, if you like humour, I recommend Terry Prattchet and his Discworld. It is fantastic, full of very inteligent humour series of fantasy stories, lampooning absolutely everything from J.R.R Tolkien to Hollywood...
Just a suggestion...
Standa.
Silly me! :rolleyes:
I forgot about Tolkien!
I know that guy all to well. He's claimed to have predicted geostationnary satellites. I saw the movie and let me tell you : the ending sucked. I had to see the sequel to understand what the lousy ending was all about.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
If you like science fiction, I recommend Arthur C Clarke. His most famous book (maybe you've heard of it) is 2001: a space odyssey.
I know most people on this planet are unintelligent. Because the majority of people say something - like God exists - does not mean it is correct. I read as a kid the books of Anthony Horrowitz. These books were very good and funny. I've also heard - among others in an interview with him - that he could easily sue her for stealing ideas and so.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
For fantasy, there are the Harry Potter books. I've never read them, but I know people of all ages who have read them and all (no exceptions) have been enthralled by it.
I already read that one long time ago. It was quite good. But thanks, I already have enough suggestions.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
If you want non-fiction that reads as interestingly as fiction, perhaps you should get your hands on Cosmos (Carl Sagan). Carl Sagan is a genius of a scientist, and this book hits on many many interesting topics.
I was hoping NOT to hear that name. :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally posted by SeventhStar
I forgot about Tolkien!
How can a person as brilliant as you, Simon, be so blind? The movies are never never never like the book! I'll grant you this: the movies sucked long and hard. But the books were good. Perhaps you'd like Asimov instead.Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
I saw the movie and let me tell you : the ending sucked. I had to see the sequel to understand what the lousy ending was all about.
I see that you've taken a vacation from your job, but do you ever take a vacation from being spiteful? :confused::eek:Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
[a lot of cynical stuff]
That's true. But it can be an indication.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
The movies are never never never like the book!
I was just trying to warn you that J.K. Rowlings books are not as original as everybody claims. Don't believe in hypes. Tolkien is also a hype. 50% of people think he's God, 50% of people think he sucks. Guess what 50% I'm in. Talking about that, I'm going to see "The Two Towers" this afternoon. The first movie was quite boring, but we'll see. :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
I see that you've taken a vacation from your job, but do you ever take a vacation from being spiteful? :confused::eek:
From Simon:
Wow wow wow! :cool:Quote:
Talking about that, I'm going to see "The Two Towers" this afternoon. The first movie was quite boring, but we'll see.
Now, Simon buster.....all movies are boring to ye' 'cept those Satanic films, k? U know it. :cool::cool::cool::cool::cool:
Everyone here is so excited for it. I get pissed off when a movie gets great reviews and I don't like it. This movie better not do that to me. Tell me how you think it is (without giving plot because I never read the books).Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
I'm going to see "The Two Towers" this afternoon. The first movie was quite boring, but we'll see. :rolleyes:
A bit hard as I was disturbed in my attention by assholes both in front and after me. The ones after me found it amusing to play drums on their popcorn canister and the one in front of me didn't seem to pay attention to the movie as he nearly constantly SMS'ed or checked SMS's on his cellphone, although without noise but with the little orange screen disturbing your view. This ruined the experience.Quote:
Originally posted by solarflare
Tell me how you think it is (without giving plot because I never read the books).
Anyway, I thought it was better than the previous one qua action. There were also more jokes (about dwarves), a couple were very good ones but some were less. There seemed to be a bit too much jokes about dwarves. Further more the characters are even more disturbingly one-dimensional than in the previous one and some scenes seem to be Greenpeace propaganda. Oh, and the scenes with annoying Liv Tyler (can't stand that woman, especially when she spaks "Elvish") are completely unnecessary and crap. I found Golem and his inner struggle with himself good (average), my brother bad.
So in short: when you're a fan of Tolkien, you'll love it, otherwise, it's a rather expensive B-movie to you, but worth seeing because of the special effects.
From Simon:
What do u know about very gorgeous gurls, Simon??!!! She's really one of those very sexy and gorgeous angels on Earth! She's so much prettier than Gisele Bundchan(or Bundchen) and any other gurls! She's so darn natural and turns all men into cazy fans of hers! But amazingly,......you seem undaunted. Maybe you're a.......??!!!Quote:
Oh, and the scenes with annoying Liv Tyler (can't stand that woman, especially when she spaks "Elvish") are completely unnecessary and crap. I found Golem and his inner struggle with himself good (average), my brother bad.
I'm not talking about looks but personality. Since you don't have the latter - nor the first :D:p - I don't expect you to understand.Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
What do u know about very gorgeous gurls, Simon??!!! She's really one of those very sexy and gorgeous angels on Earth! She's so much prettier than Gisele Bundchan(or Bundchen) and any other gurls! She's so darn natural and turns all men into cazy fans of hers! But amazingly,......you seem undaunted. Maybe you're a.......??!!!
All those people annoying Simon in the movie theater - they were me!
Well, I admit it, it wasn't me. But maybe the moderators here, who seem to have unlimited powers (and they're always using them in new ways) were the ones you saw.
Thx for the movie review, Simmy. Is it ok if I call u Simmy?
From Simon:
Don't be silly, Simon! Liz Tyler is both darn angel-looking and has a sweet personality. The truth is : u want her for your wife but u're too shy to admit. Really, but it's natural for any real man to think this way. But if you're a female or a 0.5 male, then that's another story, of course.:rolleyes: :rolleyes:Quote:
I'm not talking about looks but personality. Since you don't have the latter - nor the first - I don't expect you to understand.
From Solar:
Arrgghhh ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!! Simmy???!!! Arrgghh!!!!! :D:D:DQuote:
Thx for the movie review, Simmy. Is it ok if I call u Simmy?
Easy, nice and cute to type! Simmy......SimmyCity 2003? SimCity 2003???!!! :D:D
Ummm... is that no?Quote:
Originally posted by Simon666
NJET!
You risk your livelihood on this site for so little! ;)Quote:
Forbidden and nearly illegal disclaimer
From Simon666:
Simmy. Do you not know that every piece of element on any web site is copyrighted, whether it's explicitly stated or not? Someone please take down this guy! A nice, fat he|| of a big juicy chance! :D:D:D:D:D:DQuote:
Forbidden and nearly illegal disclaimer : this is not a copy-righted picture.
From Simon:
Card game?! Card games are created by real companies run by real men with real tough tools and toys, sonny! :oQuote:
It is the cover of a box of some sort of card game. Every moron can scan that. It is not explicitly stated and I did not find any disclaimers on that site, so maybe Xeon is right for once in is life, although I doubt it.
There's some company logos that don't have a (r) or a (tm) or a (sm), but they're still registered.
Can someone please stop these kinda illegal acts and call the cops? The moderators really should do something.
But I'm darn willing to declare that Simon is innocent, provided that he sends 1 pretty and really really erotic **** to me every week, for me to add in to my collection. I can't wait, Simon. :):D:D:):D:D
What picture? What card game? What is everybody rambling about? Xeon, is there something is wrong inside your head, seeing things that aren't there? And which one of these questions is rethorical? :D :p :rolleyes:
From Simon:
Nice trick, Simon! I bet you deleted that post away cos' you're afraid of the cops and of me! My! I scared you, didn't I? :p:D:p:D:p:DQuote:
What picture? What card game? What is everybody rambling about? Xeon, is there something is wrong inside your head, seeing things that aren't there? And which one of these questions is rethorical?
Now, kid......tell me who's the man and I might consider letting you off once and for all if your answer is correct. :o
You're mistaking fear for annoyance. :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Nice trick, Simon! I bet you deleted that post away cos' you're afraid of the cops and of me! My! I scared you, didn't I?
I'm the man. :cool: Oh, and while I'm on this topic: the fourth question was rethorical. :cool: :pQuote:
Originally posted by Xeon
Now, kid......tell me who's the man and I might consider letting you off once and for all if your answer is correct. :o
From Simon:
I'm da' man, not you, Simon! You *%$%#)_)|+!!!!!!!! :cool: :cool: :cool:Quote:
I'm the man. :cool: Oh, and while I'm on this topic: the fourth question was rethorical.
Don't gimme crap, sonny. If you do, you might find yourself waking up one morning with lots of explosive warheads tied to your bed, which in turn, is tied to you. Now, isn't that a darn nice scenario to ponder about? What's gonna happen next in that kinda situation?
5......4.......3.....2.......1......Nothing happens.
10 seconds later, u thought everything was safe again, and you wait to be rescued. But.......tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee!
BOOM-CROGGGG-Grrsssghhhh! Immense explosion that shook the entire Europe! :D:D:D
Isn't it a bit dumb to give away your tactics? Maybe I should ask you to be enlisted in the "Dumbest codeguru" poll. :D :pQuote:
Originally posted by Xeon
5......4.......3.....2.......1......Nothing happens.
10 seconds later, u thought everything was safe again, and you wait to be rescued. But.......tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee-tee!
BOOM-CROGGGG-Grrsssghhhh! Immense explosion that shook the entire Europe! :D:D:D
From Simon:
What do u know about cool sound effects, kid???!!!!Quote:
Isn't it a bit dumb to give away your tactics? Maybe I should ask you to be enlisted in the "Dumbest codeguru" poll.
These are the kinda sound effects which the Hollywood directors are crazy about! Jealous, ain't you??!! :p:p:p:p:p:p
Did I say something about sound effects? :rolleyes: For other readers : this time I have deleted or edited nothing. Xeon : I tell you : do not listen to the voices inside your head. A cute French **** named Jeanne d'Arc did this once and ended up being barbecued by a bunch of English guys. :eek:Quote:
Originally posted by Xeon
What do u know about cool sound effects, kid???!!!!
These are the kinda sound effects which the Hollywood directors are crazy about! Jealous, ain't you??!! :p:p:p:p:p:p