:blush: ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathew Joy
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:blush: ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathew Joy
But it was funnier with those smilies...:)
fixed :blush:Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathew Joy
Thank you :D
:thumb: :wave:
Your welcome anytime :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathew Joy
Whoa, Ejaz........those were nice jokes!!!!! :D:D
From Max's signature:
One of the most witty quote from Einstein. Nice! :D That means that WW III will be fought with nukes, bringing a human-created version of doomsday onto all mankind, and bringing the world to where it started : the age of prehistoric man. :DQuote:
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones - Albert Einstein
Good day,
Xeon.
che_rish or gurley.. could any of you clarify this quote which was taken from an encyclopedia (or micklopedia)?Quote:
Originally Posted by Mick
Com'on, girls are humans too. Like I said, MiCk has really gone crazy.
I dunno about you, but lots of people in the US have been known to use the PC(on chat, IM and forum-posting) when they're drunk. I mean, if you're drunk, of course you get some sleep, but apparently......these guys don't. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
Good day,
Xeon.
well now, Xeon, don't make any assumtions, even MrE=mc2 said he doesn't know what weapon would be used in WWIII...:rolleyes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Xeon
btw, don't forget the Matrix got you... they won't allow a nuke war to happen..;):p
That is THE best resuma I've ever seen.Quote:
Originally Posted by Ejaz
(is it just me or does the singing add an essence of desperation?)
Doctor : "shall i give your wife local anaesthetic?"
Businessman:" Certainly not .I Can afford some thing imported.
A Paki, Bangladeshi and an INDIAN are in a bar one night having a beer. The Paki drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "In Islamabad our glasses are so cheap that we don't need to drink from the same one twice."
The Bangladeshi [obviously impressed by this] drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the glass to pieces. He says "In Dhaka we have so much sand to make the glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either."
The Indian, cool as a cucumber, picks up his beer and drinks it, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the Paki and Bangladeshi. He says "In Delhi we have so many Paki and Bangladeshi that we don't need to drink with the same ones twice."
Long live Bachelors
Every man should get married some time; after
all,happiness is not the only
thing in life!!
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair
that some men should
be happier than others.
--Oscar Wilde
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Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
--Scottish Proverb
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I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years.
--Sam Kinison
----------------------------------------------------------------------
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you
expensive answers that your
wife will give you for free.
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't, they'd
be married too.
--H. L. Mencken
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later; for
another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken
----------------------------------------------------------------------
- "A man without a woman is like a fish without a
bicycle."
- U2
----------------------------------------------------------------------
- Marriage is a three-ring circus:
--engagement ring
---wedding ring
---suffering
---------------------------------------------------------------------
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of
one thing: either the car is new or the wife.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.
--Anonymous
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" She said,"Some where I have never
been!" I told her,
"How about the kitchen?"
--Anonymous
------------------------------------------------------------------
We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.
--Anonymous
-------------------------------------------------------------------
She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.
Then
the mud fell off.
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump
in."
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.
He says "the wedding rings look like minature
handcuffs....."
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in
first?
The Dog of course... at least he'll shut up after u
let him in!
--Anonymous
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
parted mother and started back toward his car when
his attention was
diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man
seemed to be
praying with profound intensity and kept repeating,
'Why did u have to
die? Why did you have to die?" The first man
approached him and said, "Sir,
I don't wish to interfere with your private grief,
but this
demonstration of pain in is
more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you
mourn so? Deeply? A
child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to
collect himself, then
replied "My wife's first husband."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish
and threw in a penny.
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
over too much, fell
into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then
smiled " It really works ! "
One Early morning a mother went to her sleeping son and woke him up.
MOM : "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school."
SON : "But why, Mama? I don't want to go to school."
MOM : "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go to school."
SON : "One, all the children hate me. Two, all the teachers hate me."
MOM : "Oh! that's not a reason. Come on, you have to go to school."
SON : "Give me two good reasons WHY I *should* go to school?"
MOM : "One, you are FORTY - FIVE years old and should understand your
responsibilities. Two, you are the PRINCIPAL of the school.
A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East
assignment. A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"
The
salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very
confident that I will make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually
unknown
there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned
to
convey the message through 3 posters...
First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... totally
exhausted and panting. Second, the man is drinking our Cola and Third,
our
man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over
the
place"
That should have worked," said the friend. The salesman replied, "Well,
not
only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs read from
right to left..."